If you enjoyed the book, check out the album Haunted by Poe. Anyone with a functioning radio in the 90s may have heard Angry Johnny a time or ten but she’s got some other good tracks too. Poe is the stage name of Anne Danielewski and, if the last name is familiar, that’s because she’s the House of Leaves author’s sister.

Friend-ulums.

Could also serve casu martzu. No name change needed, it’s scary enough as-is.

On a related note, https://youtube.com/watch?v=Gg5KfL-4asE

Careful Pinocchio, one more lie and she’s going to start choking.

Somebody misread “ſeptember” and just went with it.

The name fits, it’s just that the only people in the world who give a shit about baseball are from the USA.

In his house at R’lyeh dead Cat-thulhu waits dreaming.

╙Ɛ(☼)3╜

It’s a teleportation device.

That’ll happen after a solid meatspinning. Merry-go-rounds can be pretty dangerous too if you’re not careful.

Not sure I love that definition, a dog walk should be relaxing and enjoyable for all involved parties.

That’s not her, it’s an im-pasta!

I want to believe that the kids mentioned in posts like this are playing along with their parents’ delusions so they don’t have to sit through another lecture about how the Federal Reserve is a Ponzi scheme and they’re chemtrailing us with fluoride.

Just some asshole.

Can’t get those from yourself.

Someplace that’s cold and far above sea level (for now).

To infinite-Heath and beyond!

They don’t need it but they’re worth it.

Stick so I can share it with a dog. In a pinch, the stick can be broken and become more sticks. This is especially useful in a multi-dog scenario.