• XEAL@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    I’m making custom cards for Cards Against Humanity and this is gold

  • don@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Is a porridge out of the question? Are soups a no-go? How about a simple Broth of Blinding for One Day? Does it really have to be a stew?

  • pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    Then watch her learn how to echolocate and then blind him permanently 🤦

    Jesus Christ. Kids do stupid shit like that. They don’t even say how old the kid is. You literally could just bitch at them and make them stop if they were old enough. Or put something harmless but bad tasting on a wig or something and have the kid chew on that, breaking the cycle.

    Why do people have to be like this?

      • pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world
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        9 months ago

        That’s exactly the sort of thing you don’t want your kid remembering. All it will do is foster in her a vengeance against you, and she would have a pretty legitimate grievance. Who blinds a child, no matter how temporary?

        • EmergMemeHologram@startrek.website
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          9 months ago

          Your parents didn’t give you blinding stew?

          It’s not that bad. It doesn’t hurt, it’s scary at first but you adapt. It never made me want to get revenge on my parents, and I haven’t jaywalked since. I actually got it twice when I got suspended from school but the second time was baloney.

          • pinkdrunkenelephants@lemmy.world
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            9 months ago

            Blinding stew isn’t actually real. It’s the fact that people apparently would use it wholeheartedly, on children, that’s horrific.

            • webadict@lemmy.world
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              9 months ago

              Lmao, this guy never got the blinding stew. My first time was when my mom thought I stole a candy bar from the grocery store, but it turned out my sister did it and planted on me, so she got double dosed, it was pretty funny.

  • tygerprints@kbin.social
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    9 months ago

    Feed her a stew that makes her go blind for a day. Well since we’re at it, you can also pull all her teeth out with pliers and cut her thumbs off so she can’t grab anything. Certainly blinding a child for being a child isn’t any kind of sick child abuse (: 0

    • key@lemmy.keychat.org
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      9 months ago

      That’s absurd. How are you supposed to reattach the thumbs after a day? And have you tried pulling teeth from a child? It’s like… well… pulling teeth.

      The blinding stew meanwhile is a time tested parenting technique.

      • tygerprints@kbin.social
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        9 months ago

        You don’t reattach the thumbs, you add them to the stew with some nice lentils and carrots. Why waste good meat.

    • Pyro@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Ah yes, because permanent physical mutilation is exactly the same as 24-hour inconvenience.

      What the fuck is wrong with you?

      • bort@feddit.de
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        9 months ago

        just reapply the thumbs when she starts to behave. Nobody said anything about making it permanenty. smh…

      • tygerprints@kbin.social
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        9 months ago

        24 hours of imposed blindness would be one HUGE hell of a lot more than a mere inconvenience. That’s my whole point, maybe you should try it. Soon you are going to find out exactly what it’s like.

        • Meowoem@sh.itjust.works
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          9 months ago

          I’m sure most of us here had 1 day blinding stew as kids when we were naughty and it never did us any harm.

          • tygerprints@kbin.social
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            9 months ago

            So is this 1 day blinding stew an actual thing or is it from some book or movie of some kind? I mean in my family pantheon of books there are some ancient recipes for a blinding cast but nothing that is for kids or lasts for 1 day - the cost of blinding a kid would come with too hefty a price, as most real magic takes a toll on the caster.